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Big Middle
Small Post at 5-11-2012 14:10 Show All Posts
Season 1
Episode 1: Pilot (Sep/28/2011)
Tessa and George have been on their own ever since Tessa's mom pulled a "Kramer vs. Kramer." So far George has done a pretty good job of raising Tessa without a maternal figure in their lives, but suddenly he's feeling a little out of his league, especially after he finds a pack of condoms in her room. So it's goodbye New York City and hello suburbs. At first Tessa is horrified by the big-haired, fake-boobed mothers and their sugar-free, Red Bull-chugging kids. But little by little, she and her dad begin to find a way to survive on the clean streets of the 'burbs. Sure, the neighbors might smother you with love while their kids stare daggers at your back, but underneath all that plastic and caffeine, they're really not half bad. Being in the 'burbs can be hell, but it also may just bring Tessa and George closer than they've ever been.
Episode 2: The Barbecue (Oct/05/2011)
Tessa is horrified when she finds herself unexpectedly attracted to her exact opposite, her jock suburban neighbor, and George is pressured by the town to throw the perfect barbecue.
Episode 3: The Chatterer (Oct/12/2011)
George joins the PTA and quickly becomes well-liked by the other moms, but in the process former PTA queen bee Sheila Shay starts to feel threatened. Meanwhile Tessa joins the school newspaper and helps Malik (Maestro Harrell) revamp it into a tabloid-style paper.
Episode 4: Don't Call Me Shirley (Oct/19/2011)
Tessa is excited to see some action in the suburbs when Sheila Shay's Shirley Temple doll collection is stolen, but not so thrilled at the consequences -- Dallas and Dalia are afraid of being burglarized so they crash at the Altmans'.
Episode 5: Halloween (Oct/26/2011)
Tessa channels her inner "suburban girl" for a Halloween costume, but it ends up spooking her friends and everyone at school since she reminds them of a recently "departed" resident of Chatswin. And George is determined to prove to Halloween-hater Dallas that being scared can be fun, but gets a scare of his own when Steven Royce (guest star Jay Mohr), Dallas' husband, finally comes home from one of his many business trips.
Episode 6: Charity Case (Nov/02/2011)
Irritated by all the cafeteria waste at school, Tessa motivates the student body to get involved with giving back. Unfortunately their charity of choice involves helping residents of Florida improve their complexions. When Tessa introduces a homeless transsexual to the student body as part of a lesson, they decide that Tessa is really the person in need. Meanwhile George receives a large dental bill from Noah, which puts a strain on their relationship.
Episode 7: Sweet Sixteen (Nov/16/2011)
When Tessa tells Dallas that she wants a simple get together for her sixteenth birthday, Dallas convinces her to let Dalia plan the ultimate birthday extravaganza at the country club, complete with a live performance by her favorite band, specialty drinks and go-go cages. Meanwhile George throws his back out and Sheila Shay (Ana Gasteyer) takes it upon herself to care for him, even though George is terrified of her.
Episode 8: Thanksgiving (Nov/23/2011)
Depressed that she has to spend Thanksgiving in the suburbs, Tessa convinces Dallas to take her to the city for a girls' day out. During their fun day, they run across George making out with a woman while he was supposed to be "working." Angry with George for lying to her, Tessa confronts him during the Royces' Thanksgiving dinner. Meanwhile Lisa refuses to wear a special dress Sheila picked out for her, so Sheila decides to literally turn up the heat.
Episode 9: The Nutcracker (Dec/07/2011)
When Tessa overhears George break up with his girlfriend, Zoe, on Skype, she blames herself for his failed relationship and decides that she's going to get them back together. Unbeknownst to her, though, George is really enamored with Tessa's cute art teacher, Aimee. He admits to Mr. Wolfe that he's over dating crazy city women, and that he's looking for love in the burbs. George decides to embrace the holiday spirit with a tree trimming party complete with ex-girlfriend, potential new girlfriend and the Royces, and he soon finds himself under the mistletoe with a special someone.
Episode 10: Driving Miss Dalia (Jan/04/2012)
When Tessa gets her driver's license, Dalia hires her to drive her around to stalk her crush, Scott Strauss (guest star Thomas McDonell). As a result Tessa realizes that she and Scott might have feelings for each other. Meanwhile George and Noah's relationship is put to the test when George decides he wants to join the local country club.
Episode 11: Out in the Burbs (Jan/11/2012)
When Tessa is asked to show new guy Josh Sherman (Dan Byrd) around school, she becomes convinced that he's gay, when in fact he's an undercover narcotics officer. Lisa becomes deeply infatuated with Josh, and Tessa inadvertly convinces Mr. Wolfe to make special announcement to the student body. Meanwhile George re-evaluates his relationship with Dallas.
Episode 12: The Casino Trip (Jan/18/2012)
When George wins an all expenses paid trip to Atlantic City, he enlists Noah, Fred, Tom and Alex, and it turns into a getaway with the guys. During their trip they run into Steven Royce (Jay Mohr) (who is supposed to be in Singapore), and they help Fred cope with his gambling problem. Meanwhile Tessa tries to get some alone time with Scott Strauss (Thomas McDonell).
Episode 13: Sex and the Suburbs (Feb/08/2012)
Tessa enjoys rubbing it in Dalia's face that Scott Strause chose her over Dalia. However the closer Tessa gets to Scott, the more nervous George becomes. When George discovers a box of XXL condoms that Lisa has given Tessa, he becomes obsessed and starts planning game night with her friends in hopes of keeping her at home more. Meanwhile Tessa soon discovers that the more time she spends with Scott, the less attracted to him she is.
Episode 14: The Body (Feb/15/2012)
When Tessa realizes that she's failing gym class, she decides to run for student body president in hopes of changing Chatswin High's obsession with sports. During the election, Lisa steps in as Tessa's campaign manager against Kenzie and Kaitlyn. Meanwhile, Ryan is injured during a wrestling match and finds himself mourned by his family, and George takes Ryan under his wing and introduces him to people who have moved forward from setbacks.
Episode 15: Fire with Fire (Feb/22/2012)
When Jill turns to the newly single Dallas for inspiration and support, her marriage to Noah goes on the rocks. Meanwhile Dallas begins spending a lot of time with her hot younger boyfriend, Yoni (Wilmer Valderrama), which causes tension with George, and Dalia befriends Lisa to get back at Tessa for dating Scott Strauss -- so Tessa decides to take action and recruits Kimantha to make Dalia jealous.
Episode 16: Poetic Injustice (Feb/29/2012)
When Fred and Sheila strike up a croquet match with Dallas and George, Fred misreads Sheila's interest in George. Fred tells George that Sheila is fantasizing about him and asks him to seduce her. Meanwhile Tessa desperately wants to impress the new poetry teacher, Ms. Evans, but she seems to prefer Dalia's prose.
Episode 17: Independence Day (Mar/14/2012)
When George picks Tessa up late from school she decides to get a job working for Dallas in order to buy her own wheels. Meanwhile Dallas invites her sorority sisters to stay with her in order to celebrate the opening of her store, A Crystal Cup of Crystals; however her rival sorority sister, Tulsa (Robin Givens), decides to crash the party,
Episode 18: Down Time (Apr/11/2012)
When Dallas's divorce is finalized, George becomes concerned and includes her in a shopping trip with Noah to buy a new mattress. Meanwhile Dalia makes a breakthrough in therapy with her psychiatrist, Dr. Richard Rohl (James Lipton), Lisa and Malik try to set up Tessa, and Ryan takes Tessa on a date.
Episode 19: Entering Eden (Apr/18/2012)
When George meets Eden (Alicia Silverstone) at the Chatswin Farmer's Market, there is an immediate attraction and he finds himself smitten with her and her healthy eating habits. Meanwhile, Yakult goes missing and it's up to Tessa and Dalia to find her, and Noah and Jill make a surprising announcement.
Episode 20: Hear No Evil (May/02/2012)
As George and Eden's (Alicia Silverstone) relationship gets serious, he decides to introduce her to Tessa, who is preoccupied with her job at Crystal Cup of Crystals. Meanwhile, George and Noah make a deal regarding George's relationship boundaries with Eden, and Eden is overwhelmed by Sheila's meddling and the Werners' overprotective behavior.
Episode 21: The Great Compromise (May/09/2012)
While Tessa tries to adjust to living with Eden, George takes issue with Eden's parenting; Lisa and Malik consider which camp they should attend.
Episode 22: The Motherload (May/16/2012)
Tessa feels a void as Chatswin celebrates mothers; Dalia goes to Israel without Dallas; Eden reacts to a baby shower's theme.
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