waterlilybarb

Well then, it's good you're not the one having a baby.   

Honestly, if I was going to have had children I would have done it in my 20s.  I have more patience now, but if I had been healthy I would have had more energy then.  Plus I was always very good with kids and was pretty patient even was I was a teen and did a lot of baby-sitting.  

I have friends that are older than me - some are in their 40s - and they have small kids now.  They're healthy and love their children, but they are so tired trying to keep up with them.  I wouldn't choose that.  However, if I married and got pregnant by accident (it happens), I would be excited and love the child.  It's one of the reasons I've chosen to stay single.  

I really don't want to have children at this point in my life.  By the time my Mum was my age, I was already out of the house.

waterlilybarb

You're smart Meg.  I think it's wise to have some time just as a married couple, if you can.  It helps you to really appreciate one another and have an identity other than Mom & Dad.  

I know my one friend who's in her 20s and married waited three years before they had their little boy.  He's almost 2 now and they're planning their 2nd one.  They only want 2 but they would like them near enough in age to be playmates.  Plus they really wanted to enjoy him being a baby & toddler before having another one.  Both come from large families, so I think they really like the idea of their children having siblings...but because things cost so much now, they really aren't planning more than 2.

waterlilybarb

It would be, but not getting to choose, I think most parents are happy with whatever they get.

waterlilybarb

That could prove to be a problem.  In many cultures, boys are preferred.  What happens when there are too many males.  Who do those parents think their sons are going to marry.  I think that's a dangerous move - though I know it's on the horizon.  I suppose that's better than people aborting girl babies because they want a son.

I have a friend from China who is an only child, and her Grandmother, on the father's side, hated her.  It wasn't that the child had done anything wrong, but she didn't like that the family name might not be carried on.  Though, from what she explained to me, if 2 only children marry they can have 2 children, if they want, and give one the girl's surname - so her father's family name will carry on.

waterlilybarb

It's not just Chinese people.  I was just giving an example.  There are plenty of people from every background who would prefer to have a son - some because they know life is harder for girls in their country, others because they think it makes them big men to sire a son.  Others are just picky.  I think it's too bad, because both sons and daughters are wonderful blessings, and should be viewed as such.

waterlilybarb

True.  That's what's neat about this thread.  The topic is always changing.

waterlilybarb

Yes, but my friend is from China.  She has only been in Canada for a couple years and was explaining the system to me.  She told me it is different for many country people - so apparently she was correct.  She also said it was more likely that if a city woman wanted to make sure she could use her father's name for a child it was more likely to be acceptable to a man from the country - especially one who had brothers.

Quote:

It is not an all-encompassing rule because it has always been restricted to ethnic Han Chinese living in urban areas. Citizens living in rural areas and minorities living in China are not subject to the law.
SOURCE

waterlilybarb

I don't think it would change most people's decision.  People get the test with an idea in mind as to what they would do depending on the outcome.  That's not to say everyone's decision are set in stone.  I have friends who found out their daughter was going to be severely handicapped, while the mother was pregnant.  The doctors tried to pressure them to abort.  I do not agree with that.  They have a beautiful child - she is blind, but has adapted to her other handicaps much better than the doctors predicted.  It's a personal decision, but I really don't think that doctors should try to impose their moral values on anyone.

waterlilybarb

I think the risk is greater as you get older, but as you say, more younger women have babies so they would be more likely to have a child with any handicap, statistically speaking.  

I don't know what the policy is here in Canada.  I don't think it's like the States where it's mandatory to have testing.  And even there, there are many women who can't afford health care, so I don't think the testing is done on all of them, since many low income women don't seek much prenatal care due to the cost.

waterlilybarb

DENTISTS

I finally made an appointment to see my dentist before I move, and he was able to fit me in tomorrow.  I'm not horribly fearful of the dentist, but I haven't been in a while and know he'll have to do a lot of scraping for the cleaning.  I'm not exactly looking forward to it.  Plus, I have to take a megadose of antibiotics before I see him, which is REALLY unpleasant.  My teeth will look great, I'll just have to feel icky for a day or two.

waterlilybarb

I was thinking that I haven't been flossing as regular as I should.  I know I'll cop some flack for it tomorrow.  It's been a couple years for me too, mainly because every time I made an appointment I wound up catching a bug - which is probably why he booked me in for tomorrow.  No time to catch anything.    I'm just waiting on my friend to bring me to the pharmacy to pick up my antibiotics.  I get to take 2000 mg tomorrow morning.  Talk about the breakfast of champions.  BLECH!

waterlilybarb

Welcome home...though it doesn't sound like you'll be there too long.   Nice to have you back with us though.

BTW, I went to the dentist today, and it was MUCH better than I expected - though it had been MUCH longer since my last appointment - 4 years!
Anyway, the dentist didn't have too much scraping to do and I had no cavities.  He said he sees people who come in after 4 months who look way worse than my 4 year hiatus.  I'll definitely not leave it so long until my next appointment, but I'm glad it's over.   Still feel a bit yucky from the handful of antibiotics I had to take though. ICK!

waterlilybarb

It's no big deal.  I have a heart murmur (as many do), so it's a precautionary measure.  It's not necessary for everyone who has a heart murmur - it all depends on the type.  I can't recall what mine is called, but my doc said it was the kind that needed the meds.  It's to prevent any possible infection from getting into the heart valves.

waterlilybarb

Will do Shannon.  You're in my thoughts too.  I know how hard it can be to be far away when there's a problem - though I've never been quite as far away as you are at the moment.

waterlilybarb

I had a nice evening tonight.  I went and had dinner at my friend's house - first time I got to see the new place - and had a fun visit & watched a girly movie.  Great girls night in, since her hubby had to work.  

The one nice thing about preparing to move away is I'm getting to spend some time with my friends.  Everyone is so busy with everyday life that it's easy to become too tired to just relax and enjoy being in the company of friends that have been around for what seems like always.  It's nice to have something that gives the incentive to make more effort.  

I'll definitely miss my friends here when I move, but life doesn't stand still for anyone.  Though I'll miss them, we'll stay in touch, and I'm looking forward to what comes next...the new friends to be made, adventures to be had and the inevitable bouts of homesickness.  Thank goodness where I'm moving is pretty much my second home, as it will make the transition a bit easier.  Not too long now and this city girl is going country!   Let's just hope my wardrobe doesn't suffer too greatly.

waterlilybarb

Thanks Doc!   I doubt I'll remember that but I know where to look when I need the correct terminology.  I'm glad my appointment went well too.  I love it when I come out knowing I won't have to return until my next scheduled cleaning.  So much nicer than having to go back for fillings or worse - though other than having my wisdom teeth out, I've never had worse than a couple fillings.

Howdy Studio!  Nice to see you.   Our arms are always open to lovely people like yourself.

waterlilybarb

You posted just before I finally was able to catch some shut eye.  I'm tired today, as I only had a couple hours of sleep, and broken sleep at that.  The phone rang a few times this morning - usually I don't hear it, but it's one of those days.  I kept getting wicked charley horses in my calves too.   Every once and a while I get them - usually if I've been slack with my calcium intake, but I think this time was just fatigue.  Anyway, I finally just decided to get up because I knew I wouldn't get anymore rest.  Hopefully I'll have a better night for sleeping tonight.

waterlilybarb

That's great Mel!  I bet you're relieved.

I'm glad you can now just concentrate on your wedding plans.  You'll have fun, I'm sure.  I've helped make invitations, and I always enjoyed myself.  Registering is not something I've done, but I bet you'll have a ball choosing things that you can picture using once you're married.

Thankfully I got a good sleep last night, well early this morning, but I slept half the day.  I figured I was going to take it whenever I could - so even though I woke earlier, I decided to close my eyes and was able to sleep for a couple more hours.  

There was a program on yesterday about sleep deprivation and how so many people are not getting enough sleep.  The interesting thing about the study was that it showed that not only is brain function affected (slower response times, etc.) but it affects the body & brain on a physiological level too.  People tend to eat more and crave high carb food when they are tired.  It causes a change in insulin levels, and can be included among the top 4 triggers for type 2 diabetes, high cholesterol and weight gain, leading to obesity.  Most people don't even realized they ARE sleep deprived, since they think 5 or 6 hours is normal.  One group that was found to be among the most sleep deprived was teens.  They need 9-10 hours of sleep per night, but most do not get that much.  With all the demands on our time sleep is the first thing to get cut for most people.  I know from another study I read that people prone to depression should be sure to get enough sleep as well.  Lack of sleep changes brain chemistry in this area too and can be a trigger for a relapse of depression.  Very interesting.  

The main tips for maintaining optimal health: exercise, eat healthy (including staying well-hydrated), and get enough sleep.

waterlilybarb

Hey gals, thought I'd remind you to check out Operation: Phoenix.  Even if you don't have time to play every game, I think it will be fun.  Red has put a lot of effort into it and it would be nice to have a few more participants.   He's even letting mods & s. mods play (though not for the prizes).  I'm looking forward to seeing all he has in store.  I know SOME, and I can't play those games, but from what I've seen, it's going to be fun.

waterlilybarb

Hello and good-night Mel.

I'm hoping for a decent sleep myself.  I have a friend coming to stay for a couple days (she'll be here later this evening) and I'd like to feel rested enough to enjoy her visit.  She's going to help me get a few errands done that I need doing before I move.  

is flying!  Less than a month and a half until my move.  I REALLY got to get myself into gear.